Yesterday we country folk took ourselves on up to the state capital to do some shopping. I haven't been to the mall in a little while and every time I go I'm a little overwhelmed at all the choices. I feel a little more comfortable in the safety of my internet shopping-it's quiet and not-pushy (what is UP with those people wanting me to try their moisturizers from their kiosks in the middle of the mall???).
Anyway, yesterday I noticed something that was amusing, yet bothersome to me. Just about every female we passed did a quick scan of us as we passed. You know what I'm talking about. Meets your eyes for an instant, then down to your feet and back up to the top of your head. In that brief moment, she has assessed style, brand names, time spent in the gym, budget for hair color, and the last time you had a manicure. Maybe you've done "the scan" once or twice yourself.
It was amusing to me because I am much older than most of the women engaging in this behavior and I left behind those kinds of concerns long ago. But it was also sad. It made me think about how much time women spend putting each other down and how unsatisfied most women are with themselves. How different things would be if that brief meeting of the eyes turned into a smile.
Psalm 144:3-4 says, "O Lord, what is man that you regard him, or the son of man that you think of him? Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow."
"Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them." Psalm 139:16
Why are we wasting our little time here time tearing one another down? And why are we so down on ourselves?
Psalm 139:13-14 "For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made."
God made you. He chose everything about you for a purpose. His purpose.
When we look at ourselves through His eyes, we see there is no reason to compare ourselves. Against anyone or anything. Against other women. Against ourselves, when we were younger/thinner/richer/happier/busier.....
Here are some things (notes I jotted down at a conference I went to this year) that we all could benefit from practicing:
* Train yourself to look at someone's countenance. What an opportunity you could have to brighten someone's day with a smile. And a friendly smile on your face is a thank you to God for all that he's done for you. You may even have a chance to encourage someone with a brief word or two when you take the time to smile at her face instead of glance at her body.
*Stop comparing abilities. God gave each of us talents and gifts. Don't dishonor God by coveting what He gave to someone else. Be the best YOU you can be.
*Stop comparing your current self with your former self. Aging is a natural process. Ladies, we are SUPPOSED to get older. Don't be discouraged when things look different or you can't do something as quickly or as well as you did when you were younger. The Bible specifically mentions how older women are to teach the younger women (Titus 2: 3-5). God has a purpose for every one at every age, but those purposes change with time.
And on the flip side,
*Do not be prideful. Be more than how you look. Be fit. Take care of your body. Eat right. Get rest. Fix yourself up-especially before you go out! Wear clothes that fit. But don't let how you look be the sum of who you are.
"For bodily exercise profits a little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life that now is and of that which is to come." 1 Timothy 4:8
*Stop comparing families. Pray for families. I can promise you that the perfect-looking family you see on Facebook and Christmas cards have their own share of heartaches. Pray for them. And pray for yours.
Imagine what could happen to the collective mindset a of women in this country if we stopped tearing one another down-with our voices, eyes, and actions, and started focusing on the things that matter to God. If our motives are to love others as He loves them, then let's start looking for ways to show it. A quick glance at someone tells us very little, if anything, about what is going on in her life. And glancing her over with judgement in our eyes does nothing to help her see Jesus. And isn't that the point of our lives?
